It’s 1 am and I keep debating if I should text you. It’s late, I can’t sleep, and this article on Buddhism isn’t doing anything. I don’t even know what I would say to you. We’re past that point. But I am dying inside and ALL I want to do is talk on the phone again. I don’t have anything to say but i’ll just listen. That seems like the greatest thing to me right now, just listening to you talk. Two ideas keep playing in my head that I can’t seem to shake 1. How we used to talk literally all night and you would always be the one to insist we call 2. Now you barely reply to my texts and I’m not sure if you even want to hold a conversation with me anymore. One makes me want you while the other holds me back. Why is this so hard. Why did you make it so hard.